To Choose Death For Life
by Carranna
Summary: Just after the battle, Tauriel makes a decision. A decision that will kill her, but give the dwarves a king. TBotFA Spoilers


**Disclaimer: The genius man named J.R. wrote the Hobbit. The genius man named Peter Jackson made movies from the Hobbit. But sadly, I was not involved with the creation of either.**

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><p>She sat at his side. She couldn't bear to leave him. He may have wanted her to, had he still lived, but she would never forgive herself if she did.<p>

She blamed herself. She had called for him. She had alerted the orc to her presence and then he had come for her. The orc had her. But Kili came, for her. And then Bolg had killed him. He had died looking at her. Not a look of pain, but something else. Something she had no words to describe.

She could feel the tears rolling down her cheeks. One landed on his cheek. She placed her hand on his cheek and, feeling that it was still warm, pulled out the talisman that he had given her on the shores of the Long Lake. A promise.

He had told her once that it represented a promise he had made to his mother, that he would return alive. And now he lay dead beside her, his eyes closed and his chest still. The clothes he wore were red with blood, as was the snow he lay on. He wouldn't see his mother again. And she was to blame. It was her fault.

It hurt to see him like this. She couldn't stand it, knowing he had died so that she could live. Without him, she didn't want to live. She couldn't bear to think of a life without him. The years would pass slowly, mournfully and empty of life, of love. No hope, no joy, no laughter, only sorrow and pain would fill the never ending years of her long life. Life would mean nothing to her. She couldn't live for ever. Not unless he was there with her, for ever.

She couldn't live for ever without him. But if he were if her place, would he be able to live out the rest of his life without her?

She couldn't live with out him. She was certain that she couldn't. She could only fade. Fade until she died.

She had lived. She had lived her life and done all she had ever wanted to. But here was Kili, young and had barely given the chance to live. He should have lived until old age took his short life. But instead he had died here on the battlefield so that she could live a life that she could no longer live.

He deserved to live. He was young and foolish, but a prince of a now dead line. He might have made a good king. She knew he would have. He may have been foolish, but he was clever too. She had seen it in his eyes.

His people deserved a good king. And he deserved to die of old age. And she deserves nothing.

There was nothing she could do with her life, she realised. Except give him his back.

She placed her hand on his still-warm chest and began to chant. She slowly felt herself become weak. She placed the talisman in his hand. She world around her seemed to fade and lose it's colour. Except for him. He became brighter. A golden light seemed to shine from him. His chest was beginning to rise and fall again.

Weaker and weaker. Until she could no longer sit. She fell to the ground. She whispered something in his ear. And then everything faded away, in to darkness.

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><p><em>Promise you will live.<em> The words danced around in his head, over and over again. The voice that said them was beautiful. Sweet and gentle.

It was a slow awakening. He opened his eyes slowly. His hair had fallen into his eyes. He sat up. It was quiet, the sky way dark and it was snowing. His chest hurt. And then it came back to him. The quest, the mountain, his uncle's madness, the battle. His death. Bolg had killed him. But yet he lived.

From the corner of his eye noticed something red. He turned to see Tauriel. Her skin was pale and her unseeing eyes were staring at him. She was dead. Not from battle, there were no visible signs that she had been hurt. There was no blood, there were no marks on her. But she was dead. And he lived.

He found the talisman in his hand. _Promise that you will live._ Had she chosen death so that he could live? Had she brought him back, even if it meant that she would die? She must have. She must have chosen his life of her hers.

Kili didn't know what to do, what to think. Only one thing was clear to him. _Promise that you will live,_ her voice whispered again.

"I promise."


End file.
